Jessica Hamby was created by the one, the only, Beel Fucking Compton. As a young vampire she had no idea what the fuck she was doing. Beel, being her maker, was supposed to guide her into his world. However, Beel had blue balls to the extreme and was very sensitive about his breast, so he abandoned his child and went in search of the one called ‘Sookie Stackhouse’. While he was off plunging Sookie’s dungeon, Jessica was left in a large, creepy home that Beel had been living in for at least a year yet it was still disgusting and i’m sure drafty. Not only had Beel abandoned her but her relationship with the human Hoyt Fortenberry was crumbling around her.
After this happened Jessica discovered a group of people and decided to stick around them and see if she could learn shit from them. She met a Russel Edgington, a Talbot, Beel’s past/future lover Lorena, a Tommy Mickens, an Alcide Herveaux, a Debbie Pelt, an Eric Northman, a Godric, a hooker named Arlene and her children, a horrible police man Andy Bellfluer, a Claudine, and so on and so forth.
Eventually shit happened (scroll back a few pages and read ya dipshit.)
Now, Beel is not only a crap maker and a shitty lover, but also the reason for a baby vamp to fall.
Jessica was caught feeding her blood to Hoyt, her ex who came back into the picture.
The Magister wasn’t to be outwitted and called a trial/court session/hearing. Obviously he knew she might just skip out and so he threatened Hoyt. However, Russell being much more in control, told Jessica he would solve it.
While awaiting more news Jessica learned that Beel had copped a feel when she was being turned and that Pam had seen some of her goodies. Not only that but she found pictures of Hoyt with another girl.
Torn into pieces from this level of horrid, Jessica began to cry tears of blood. People comforted her with their Bosoms and even Captain Jack Sparrow offered to help.
Then The Authority began to follow her.
Knowing this Jessica began to lose it. Even admitting that she missed Tommy. This is surprising considering they were usually bickering or taunting.
Hoyt has stated that the pictures of him with others and of being a monster are fake. Jessica prays they are.
And so the story goes…
